For better or for worse

What do you do when your spouse shouts or swears at you? Do you shout back or do you cower? Do you flip him/her the bird or do you calmly ask, “why are you shouting at me?” Do you head for the guest room or pack your bags??

What if you started it?

Not by shouting or swearing, but by ignoring, withholding, and generally being pissy. We all have those days, don’t we? And apparently those days can impact other people. How do you hold a relationship together, when really, being on your own seems so much easier than saying sorry.

And lonelier.

Are two people really meant to co-exist in the same space? For all eternity? The Yogi Osho certainly didn’t believe so. About half of my friends are either divorced, separated or weighing their options. It’s actually reached epidemic proportions. Did you hear about that 80 year old lady that woke up from a life-saving operation, took one look at her 80+ year old husband and said, “Look, I may not have many years left, but I’m sure as hell not spending them with you.” Ouch.

For better or for worse. It’s in our vows, but I don’t think that I really understood the “worse” part when I said “I do.” 13 years later, I know that “for worse” is tough. For worse can quickly seem like life without parole, which is probably why so many people make a run for it. But getting back to better from worse, is tough work too, especially if your partner is not so quick to forgive and forget. Luckily for me and my husband, I have a terrible memory.

Love Lucie

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