As most fans of magazines are, I am quite easily swayed by marketing mumbo-jumbo. Words like “luminescence”, “heathy glow”, and “erase your stretch marks forever” catch my attention and open my wallet immediately. Unfortunately, despite the industry’s efforts for “truth in advertising”, many products’ claims don’t mesh with reality. As such, a product wasteland is taking over my bathroom countertop. The problem is that I am part product junkie, part environmentalist and part Ebenezer Scrooge, so I am loathe to throw my money and half used bottles into our landfills.
So after two uses, that stinky Burt’s Bees Shea Butter Decollete Cream has been collecting dust since the birth of my first son 9 years ago. Every now and then, I’ll notice the pretty mauve tube sitting on my countertop. I’ll read the product information again and if my husband is travelling overnight, I’ll be suckered into rubbing the stinky, slippery cream into my breasts that have nursed 3 healthy sons. Every morning after, I do the “I can’t believe I fell for that again” walk of shame away from the bathroom mirror. No matter what Burt and their Bees say, there is just no non-surgical way of resurrecting my decollete. However, the product does do wonders for my sinuses!
Others on the product dud list include:
– Palmer’s Cocoa Butter Vitamin E Scar Serum
– Vintage Beauty Vinotherapy Stretch Mark Massage Oil
– JASON Vitamin E Oil
– Guinot Instant Eye Mask
– VIDA P-balance Facial Oil
– Jan Marini eyelash growth serum
– Phytomer Comedogel (this tube is at least 13 years old and I gave it another try last night!)
– Phytomer Peeling Vegetal
– Reversa Glycolic Acid Solution
– Life Brand Scar Gel
– Benefit Lip Scrub
– Banana Boat Aloe After Sun Lotion
Looking at this pile, I can see there are a lot of untruths in marketing targeted to women with stretch marks! Seriously, haven’t we suffered enough?