I am a cougar. And a milf, or so I’ve been told. When the occasion dictates, I enjoy getting dressed up in clothes that enhance my ass(ets). I flirt with those 20-something dudes with a gusto that I never could have managed when I was in my 20’s. A happy marriage, kids, and alcohol all contribute to this gusto and I am proud of the attention (no matter how inebriated those boys are). However, as Kenny Rogers so aptly put it, “you got to know when to hold ’em, and know when to fold ’em…”
I was in Whistler this weekend with my love celebrating our 12th wedding anniversary. After a lovely 4 course dinner at the Rimrock Cafe complete with Moet, followed by a lot of Joie’s unoaked chardonnay and a Patron shooter, when we cabbed over to Buffalo Bill’s to dance off a little bit of that delish toffee bread pudding. The place was packed as per usual on a summer Saturday night, but we got in without too much of a wait. One of the things Bills is known for is the cage by the dance floor. There, 2 or 3 exhibitionists gyrate to the beat, ride up and down the bars and indulge in various pleasures much to the delight of the crowd. And while they’re not paid performers, they’ve got it and they want to flaunt it! Well this Saturday night was no exception, as the cage held 2 women on the backside of 40, attacking a man that bore strong resemblance to a very happy Lou Ferrigno. As I danced my way over to get a closer look at Lou, one of the women, pulled on the neck of her top and flashed her saggy boobs at me. Cougars gone wild!!
Similarly, readers of Hello! Canada were recently treated to a picture of Sophia Loren’s 74 year old guns, floating atop her black evening gown not unlike poached eggs swimming in hollandaise sauce and lots of cracked black pepper. Don’t get me wrong, I love the talented Ms. Loren and know that I don’t have a chance of looking one-half as good as her when I’m 74, but you can bet that I will have walked away from the decollete-baring evening gowns by then.